Keep on Keeping on

Okay, I’ll put it out there…

Sometimes I’m not a “glass half-full…” Kind of guy. Heck…. Sometimes I’m a “I haven’t even got a glass” type of fella. I get disappointed! And not just in life, but at God too. There, I’ve said it….Sometimes I get down-right annoyed, disappointed, and hacked-off with the all mighty….But here is the question , Is it OK to be disappointed at God

I’ve gone backwards and forth, and up and down around this question for a while, as though on some kind of spiritual seesaw. I’ve googled, researched, asked spiritual leaders, and been handed/posted/emailed 101 commentaries on the story of Job – and every one of them seem to fall on one side of a spiritual fence. Almost like we are walking a tight rope of faith until our once held theological hope is shattered and we fall straddled on said spiritual fence, destined to keel over in pain one of two ways. OK, for those of you who are blissfully unaware to disappointment, let me tell you about a classic faith approach.

You usually get 1 of 2 responses.

Either:

Scenario 1: “You’re allowed to yell, scream, swear and shout at God till you’re blue in the face because… Afterall he can take it. He knows everything that you have been through.” People quote the classic Psalm 139 verses about hairs on your head, and then launch into… “He’s with you in your anger anyway….you might as well share it with him….”

The above is for the extroverts amongst us. And then there’s one for us introverts who like to internalise everything…

Scenario 2: “Everything happens for a reason, and God is always in control. We just need to trust in him, and it will all work out well. We know this because it says in Romans 8:28…In all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”

I mean, I don’t doubt the truths at the core of the statements, but neither seem to particularly cut the mustard, and having someone pluck scripture out of the bible like it’s a magic wand is not always helpful. Follow me on this one:

Like in scenario 1 where we yell: If we go for the all-out vocal onslaught at God, then it feels like it can cross over into cussing him? But then…. is that ok because “he knows what’s in our heart anyway”?

And whilst Jesus took all the sins of the world upon himself at the cross, can he really sympathise with EVERY situation you and I have been through. i.e. I’m not sure Jesus felt disappointment when….[insert situation….he had his console taken away from him for being rude to his parents].

Or in the 2nd scenario…

Scenario 2 where God is in control of everything: Well, what happens to the individual whose partner of 15yrs has just walked out on them. The couple who has lost their child in a car crash. The sibling whose sister has been diagnosed with a terminal disease. Or the Christian bookshop owner whose business has just gone bankrupt. Does trusting in God mean that you and your disappointment are not valid? That somehow you’re not trusting God enough if you are not happy about the situation because “God is in control”?

I’ve been faced with both of these scenarios, turmoil’s, heart aches and disappointments over the past few years. My now 6yr old daughter has been diagnosed with a terminal illness since Sept 2020, and I have tried both faith responses to disappointment. The walking with, and the walking away. The crying out, and the inward cry. The hope of a new morning, and the shattered dreams that come with the night. And whilst I have no complete answer, I also know there is a better way. And this is it…

I keep on, keeping on.

Let me explain. Yes, I believe in Jesus. Yes, I believe in the truths of the bible, and I also believe that the bible is God breathed.

What I don’t believe, is that the individual stories that God worked through (and are written in the bible) are in themselves sacred. I don’t want to cause offence to anyone and I’m very happy to be challenged, but what is depicted in the bible are accounts of who God is, and what is portrayed on those pages point to the character of God. It is the expression and portrayal of God that opens the way for us to know him, that gives the physical pages life, and therefore qualifies it as Holy – not the stories themselves in isolation.

So much of what is written in the bible are people’s accounts that point to a culture that took place in that present day (I have often wondered what the bible would be like if it were written now – but that’s for another time). Ultimately (I think), it is to show us the nature of God as a Father, and at his core there also lies this mantra to also “keep on keeping on”.

A keeping on to reach the lost. A keeping on of loving people. A keeping on creating. A keeping on restoring one day.

I love the simultaneous imagery of God keeping on, finding ways to touch and reengage humanity as humanity keeps on trying to find him.

Sometimes we stumble and sometimes we fall, and most of the time I fail whilst trying to pursue God through the vast amount of excrement this life offers; but what I do know is that however we communicate with God, the most important thing is that we keep on keeping on with him. It is in this keeping on that we truly find him, and truly find a peace with our disappointments.

Friends let’s today pray for:

  • Every individual who is struggling to keep going in faith, and those especially who feel they have stopped.
  • Those children and young people whose depression is causing them to contemplate suicide. Pray that God provides them someone to talk to and find help.
  • God to provide some joy ‘fireworks’ during heartbreak for those who need it.
  • For our government who really need wisdom at this moment in time.
  • That as a people group, we will be sympathetic to people’s brokenness, and respond with a Father God’s heart.

Written by Dave Clarke, Director for Swindon Youth for Christ